What's Infertility like?

So admist all of the adoption questions, I also still get questions especially after the blog about infertility. A brave woman asked me the other day... "What is it like to be infertile?" She was not being rude. She explained that a good friend was struggling to conceive and she did not understand what she was going through. 

I thought about it for a little bit and this is what I said...
Do you remember the scandal a while back about the girl who was 16 years old and was getting baby ads through Target. The dad got mad at Target and then it turned out they had very correctly marketed and she was pregnant. Here is the article. Anyway, they use your debit card purchases, checks, etc to formulate ideas about products you like, your stage in life i.e. pregnant, single, you have children and then they market by sending ads related only to the products you would most likely need. When this article came out I remember thinking I bet I really screw up their system. 
This is what I was buying at the grocery store... and yes typically all at once because I did not want to admit defeat and have to make another trip to the store to buy whatever I actually needed..

If walking up to the checkout counter and buying tampons, pregnancy tests, and ovulation kits does not scream YES I AM STRUGGLING TO GET PREGNANT. I do not know what will. This is a pretty funny situation looking back on it though. 

Anyways back on topic, this is the story I told the curious woman. I said as confused as Wal-Mart marketing probably was, my body was more confused. Mentally and physically, you are wondering which end is up. Right at the time that you find out "welp I am not pregnant this month" is the same time mother nature blesses you with tears, irrational anger and sadness. Infertility feels like something wrong, you do not feel right in the check out line or in your own skin. 

In the telling of this story, myself and the curious woman had several laughs and several serious moments. That is how infertility should be too. If you are struggling with infertility and have not found a way to laugh at something anything you are going through, TRY. Start with something small that is not related to the situation and then build from there. There are also times to be serious. Make sure you take the time to be serious and reflect on everything you are going through. This is a great time to include your partner and find out what they are feeling too. Keep it brief. One of my favorite things is 5 minutes of sadness or anger and then pick up the pieces. 

I hope this helps anyone going through these issues and anyone trying to find a way to talk to a person struggling with infertility and understand how they feel. 

Aiden update: Today is his due date but he is yet to make an appearance or even attempt to descend into the birth canal so we are still waiting. I will let you know soon!