“National
Adoption Month”, I didn’t even know such an event existed, but it was recently
brought to my attention and I was asked if I would share some of my thoughts on
the subject. I was very hesitant – I’m
not a writer and not always good at expressing myself – my kids would probably
agree….I’m not good at telling jokes, terrible at telling a good story, don’t
remember words to songs….I just make them up as I go along and I can’t even do
the hokey pokey right…. but yet she (Nicole) wants me to write about adoption! Where do I begin? What do I share? Who really even cares? I don’t know but here goes……….
MY LIFE
I grew up
with three older brothers, two older sisters and two cousins. I was the youngest of EIGHT!! Not only was our family big, but we were all
adopted at birth over a span of 17 years during the 40’s and 50’s to an
extraordinary couple. I’m sure our
homecoming could never be compared to the adoption process of today. My dad was a doctor and one by one we found
our way to this wonderful family. I
don’t really know the events that led up to each adoption but I think the 40’s
& 50’s were hard times for a lot of families and even more difficult for
single mothers.
We were all
told at a young age that we were adopted and if at any time we wanted to seek
out our birthmother they would help.
When I was young, I don’t ever remember any of my siblings talk about
being adopted but then again as I was growing up the older ones were leaving
home. BUT, I would imagine at one time
or another we all asked ourselves WHY? Not just once but several times! As we
grew older and had families of our own some chose to seek out their
birthmothers and make a connection, some have a relationship, some found the
info they wanted and left it at that, while others had no desire to search.
One thing
I’ve learned is that it is not always easy for the birthmother to create an adoption plan. Everyone’s circumstances
are different. In my situation I did
have an older sibling but yet I was the one that was let go. I think about that and try to understand but
I take a breath and say THANK YOU because she had the courage to know it was
the best thing for all of us at the time.
It is something to this day she continues to live with.
I hear those
dreadful stories on the news of mothers/fathers killing their children because
they think that is the only way out. If
only they knew how many families are dying to have a child and there are some
that have children and aren’t fit to be a parent. All I can do is pray for them and hope they
have a good life.
In closing,
I had the best life ever!! Some siblings
have passed on and some of us aren’t as healthy as we once were. But one thing is for certain, we were all
truly blessed to grow up at Sunnymeade and be part of the Murphy gang. For all the laughs and heartache that’s
happened over the years…Mom & Daddy, we THANK YOU for having such a huge
heart and sharing your love with each and every one of us for it was the kind
of family that some only dream about...
And to Jason
& Nicole……….I continue to support you on this journey thru the good times
and bad for I know you too have a huge heart.
Love you, Mom
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